(Wednesday, April 3, 2024)
I have focused much on my Ralph Waldo Emerson “numinous” dream. Months after recording it I discovered that he suffered from a stroke and had aphasia: difficulty with words. Very sad for such a great poet. Today on Google I see he had semantic dementia for the final two decades of his life. My MRI report suggests I have semantic dementia. I need to hear what my neurologist has to say. Tears.
(Wednesday, April 3, 2024) three-quarter moon Aquarius / tarot eight of pentacles
Hypnagogia:
I met with my new neurologist yesterday. I love her. She said, “You are good,” but prescribed some testing anyway. Yesterday I had bloodwork and today I had a brain MRI. She said low levels of B6 and B12, or a stroke, can cause “speech impairment.”
I have never had an MRI before. It was fine, did not bother me. Midway through the process I started to see orange images behind my closed lids. The first was an owl, which stayed with me for awhile, looking into my eyes. Then I saw other animals, Jedis, spirit guides and aliens. All were focused on my internal vision. My third eye? I don’t know.
Synchronicity:
Monday I received Cindy’s monthly email, this one showing her beautiful March journal. My favorite photo was a red velvet chair and I replied, telling her about the time of my life when I used to shop for old furniture for art projects. My friend Anna, now living in Arizona, sent me a picture of the painted chair I had gifted her many years ago, and I sent the photo to Cindy. Synchronicity again between us: a New England artist friend of hers just sent a painting that looked exactly like the seat of Anna’s chair.
Day notes:
Just received results from MRI. Doctor has not reviewed them yet:
1. No acute intracranial abnormality is demonstrated.
2. Mild diffuse parenchymal volume loss with greater asymmetric volume loss in the left temporal lobe. This appearance has been described in the setting of semantic dementia.
3. Minimal presumed chronic white matter microangiopathy.
(Easter Sunday, 2024) third quarter moon Sagittarius / tarot nine of wands
The environment of the dream is a thick, green forest. In the beginning, I start a walk at the edge of the woods, next to multiple windows along the first floor of a building. I look into the windows; the top of the structure is not visible to me. I think it is just one story.
My journey is about neurology. When I reach the middle of the thicket I focus on my brain function. Tests and questions are sent to my telepathic mind. After a long yet calm process I head back to the edge of the woods, to town. I explore the hilly village for a while, searching for something within the small buildings. That function of the dream has evaporated.
I return to the tree-filled center. There is an open circle between the trees. I meet with journalist Chuck Todd and his female coworker, whom I do not recognize. I describe the neurology experience. He is supportive. As he listens, he gently touches my back with his left arm. To me, the most powerful experience of my wander is the discovery of a perfectly flat black-tar road. I describe it to him. I am very impressed by the deep color and the pristine surface. It almost feels like it is made of gems. A nave within a verdant cathedral. My holy meander.
Day notes:
My neurology appointment is on Tuesday (with a female doctor).
My male dream guide often touches my back.
Black: mother-fertility-mystery-death
I’ve not been a fan of Chuck Todd (former host of “Meet the Press”). I do admire how he boldly confronted his employer about hiring Ronna McDaniel, former head of the RNC and stolen election conspiracy theorist. Basically, he got her fired. Yay.
