Category: Denise

(Saturday, May 13, 2023) third quarter moon Pisces / tarot Empress

Early this morning I moved from a dream into sleep paralysis. In the dream, I am a fully Indigenous woman and that makes my dream self very grateful to finally experience a part of my ancestral roots. Deeply happy.

I am walking in a huge brick building, wandering to the upper floor and the far corner room of that story. I am aware of a pandemic, but not sure if it is from 1918 or 2019. Research officials are requiring Native Americans to provide data. They have entered the building but I close the door because I am not ready for interrogation.

Here is where sleep paralysis begins. I am lying in a double bed in the peak, corner room. I cannot move. I roll side-to-side, pull on the blankets, and try to sit up. I want to be awake so I can lock the door. After tremendous effort I am able to become alert and move my body without restrictions. Yet I keep falling in and out of paralysis, maybe a dozen times. It feels like a two-hour process, even though one statement on Google says paralysis lasts only one or two minutes.

Day notes:

I have been skeptical of my maternal family story that Chief Wapasha (Dakota and Ojibwe) was a great+ grandfather and his daughter (name unknown) was a great+ grandmother, since my DNA is fully European. Based on this dream, I looked up DNA and found that great-great-great grandparents (and more) may not have shared DNA with every descendent. The family tree that includes Wapasha does show up on Ancestry.com and other locations. Who knows. But the dream felt very comforting.

My aunt Mary Murphy tried for years to get us joined with the Mdewakanton Sioux community in Shakopee. At one point, I think the early 20th century, it was required for members to make an official application, with the government or the Dakotas, I am not sure. Our ancestors did not do this, and so we were not accepted by the Mdewakantons. Or so my relatives said. Members of my family that have this background information have all passed away.

(Monday, May 8, 2023) tarot nine of swords

I travel to Japan and enter a tall building to meet two members of a communal group. I am confident they will speak English, and they do. I am there to ask for a gift. It is an acceptable request, as my team has provided a gift in the past to the Japanese team. Once I am handed the gift (which I can’t identify after I wake up), I head down layers and layers of stairs. Turning, turning, turning.

Day notes:

I tell Chris this morning about my nine of swords tarot card. I speculate Jeanne may be sharing a nightmare in dream group tonight, which is the case.

I ask Chris if he enjoyed his Noir Night movie and he said it was “Tokyo Joe.” Also, today a Japanese space vehicle landed on the moon for the first time.

Dream Circle, May 29, 2023:

“I participate in a ritual between two cultures: one West, one East. We have been sharing gifts of many varieties for years. Stories, art, spirituality, all. We understand each other, in spite of deep language barriers. In my waking life, of course, I wonder what the Eastern culture is in my present experience. Perhaps a change in patterns. Rereading “No Death, No Fear” by Thich Nhat Hanh is shifting my mindset and my physical sensations. I think about his teachings for most of the day. Turning, turning, turning. A time for every purpose under heaven.“

(Friday, May 5, 2023) full moon eclipse Scorpio / tarot: The Empress

In the opening scene of the dream, a highly evil man is raping my sister Jamie. I can see the bed from above; I may be floating out of body. My sister is terrified and I sense her overwhelming horror. Her legs are spread wide-open. Perhaps her non-resistance is a hope that the rape will be over soon, although murder is possible. The man is a serial killer. Worse.

The next scene shifts to a large communal building that houses the rape room. Hundreds of humans are scattering, hoping to escape the prowling, ominous man. He shows up in a large, grey, windowless room near a set of concrete stairs and captures several people within his long, powerful arms. Me included.

This is the most fright one could experience in life, the potential for imminent murder. The devil-man focuses on me and laughingly pushes me out of the bundle of victims. I am free. Is that an advantage for him, or for me? End of the dream.

Day notes:

I have been having dreams with prescient elements that follow on the same day. It’s a bit of a shock. The evening after this dream I watched the 1999 movie “Joan of Arc” and the first scene was Joan/Jeanne’s sister Catherine being raped and murdered by an English soldier. The second scene was young Jeanne being confronted by a black wolf, which reminded me of my 2017 Glastonbury black wolf dream (during my 60th birthday and the celebration of Beltaine).

My real-life sister Jamie has been raped multiple times in her life, including by her current “partner.” She was born with no hip socket. She had to wear a cast as a toddler that spread her thighs in order to create an artificial socket. She finally had hip surgery six weeks ago.

I live near the Joan of Arc church.