Category: Denise

(Saturday, March 14, 2015) Third quarter moon Capricorn / tarot: four of cups reversed

A quick snapshot. I am wearing a formal white wig, the kind common around the time of the American and French revolutions. Curled hair is piled high on my head but the wig is not as ornate as those worn by the French aristocracy. Yet I am French. My light cotton summer frock is baby blue, without lace or ornamentation.

I am seated in a wooden chair at the bedside of my husband, who has been ill for some time. I am spooning a clear, warm broth into his mouth. I recognize my husband as Christopher, but his name in this lifetime is Louis.

(Tuesday, March 3, 2015)  Waxing gibbous moon in Leo / tarot: Lovers reversed

Lola is telling me about our lifetimes together. She sits gazing at me, in front of windblown sand dunes. I remember the dunes from my childhood, growing up near Moore Lake. Now the beach is protected: it’s a rare geological formation and a breeding ground for painted turtles. So I know that Lola is Boots, my first feline companion. He was incredibly dear to me. Boots used to bring full-grown mallards home from the lake and put them in the window well. He was an amazing hunter. Once he left a dead muskrat by our pool. Boots and Lola are both tuxedos (black and white).

 

(Thursday, February 26, 2015)  First quarter moon in Gemini / tarot: four of wands reversed

Something catastrophic and horrifying has happened in my life. I am seated at a table in a lounge or dining car, in a moving passenger train, and I am very sad.

I face the front of the train. My old friend and art studio-mate Denisea Elsola is across the table from me. My coworker Jeremy from IS (Information Services) is seated at my left side. Our shoulders and arms touch. I feel his hand search and drop behind my waist. I get the signal: I lean closer to him. He moves his arm to encircle my waist and pulls me close, which makes me relaxed and happy. I’ve been lonely. He is a good man, intelligent and sensitive.

Denisea does not approve. She glares at us. I love her dearly but I don’t understand her suspicion. Someone else is seated next to Denisea, I think the woman from North Carolina who helps with the gallery shows at the IASD. She moves to the back of the car, becoming involved in some kind of altercation that I ignore. Maybe gambling. Jeremy goes to sort it all out.

I look out the window and see that the “train” is just a single car, painted pale blue like the City of Lakes buses from my childhood. The track it runs along resembles a roller coaster, made from old yellow steel tubing. The track seems to connect heaven and earth: we are so high off the ground only sky is visible. The descent is incredibly steep and the turns wildly sharp. I worry about the driver’s ability to control the car. Will the brakes hold?

Day notes:

 

My second dream about having a coworker lover from the IS department. The earlier dream was about Mitch from Phoenix. Jeremy was in our marketing department today, helping with some video software. I hadn’t seen him in a couple of months.

 

Even though a component of this dream is a rather terrifying amusement park ride, the overarching emotion is one of comfort and happiness in love. My lover is the one who knows how to fix my circuitry, reprogram my processing systems. My hardware and my software.

 

Elements of gaming and trickery. Denisea must be a disapproving aspect of myself.