Category: Denise

(Monday, May 22, 2023) waxing crescent moon Cancer / tarot Strength

Snowball woke me up at 5 am for his breakfast. I fell asleep again and dreamed that I was asleep and dreaming. I was aware of my sleeping self lying on a bed in the top floor of a large communal house. When I awoke within the dream, I made the decision to do some house-cleaning. It was raining and I no longer had a job, so I went down to the basement to grab a vacuum cleaner. My mother was there, a “lower-level” being.

I climbed the stairs back up to the top. I sensed the presence of Claudia. We both felt like putzing at cleaning, in a slow and relaxed way. No pressure for speed or obsessiveness. Even so, the dream was full of detailed and colorful images of the house furnishings.

Day notes:

I am reading “No Death, No Fear.” When Thich would meditate, he would breathe in and think, “I have arrived.” He would breathe out and think, “I am home.”

(Saturday, May 13, 2023) third quarter moon Pisces / tarot Empress

Early this morning I moved from a dream into sleep paralysis. In the dream, I am a fully Indigenous woman and that makes my dream self very grateful to finally experience a part of my ancestral roots. Deeply happy.

I am walking in a huge brick building, wandering to the upper floor and the far corner room of that story. I am aware of a pandemic, but not sure if it is from 1918 or 2019. Research officials are requiring Native Americans to provide data. They have entered the building but I close the door because I am not ready for interrogation.

Here is where sleep paralysis begins. I am lying in a double bed in the peak, corner room. I cannot move. I roll side-to-side, pull on the blankets, and try to sit up. I want to be awake so I can lock the door. After tremendous effort I am able to become alert and move my body without restrictions. Yet I keep falling in and out of paralysis, maybe a dozen times. It feels like a two-hour process, even though one statement on Google says paralysis lasts only one or two minutes.

Day notes:

I have been skeptical of my maternal family story that Chief Wapasha (Dakota and Ojibwe) was a great+ grandfather and his daughter (name unknown) was a great+ grandmother, since my DNA is fully European. Based on this dream, I looked up DNA and found that great-great-great grandparents (and more) may not have shared DNA with every descendent. The family tree that includes Wapasha does show up on Ancestry.com and other locations. Who knows. But the dream felt very comforting.

My aunt Mary Murphy tried for years to get us joined with the Mdewakanton Sioux community in Shakopee. At one point, I think the early 20th century, it was required for members to make an official application, with the government or the Dakotas, I am not sure. Our ancestors did not do this, and so we were not accepted by the Mdewakantons. Or so my relatives said. Members of my family that have this background information have all passed away.

(Monday, May 8, 2023) tarot nine of swords

I travel to Japan and enter a tall building to meet two members of a communal group. I am confident they will speak English, and they do. I am there to ask for a gift. It is an acceptable request, as my team has provided a gift in the past to the Japanese team. Once I am handed the gift (which I can’t identify after I wake up), I head down layers and layers of stairs. Turning, turning, turning.

Day notes:

I tell Chris this morning about my nine of swords tarot card. I speculate Jeanne may be sharing a nightmare in dream group tonight, which is the case.

I ask Chris if he enjoyed his Noir Night movie and he said it was “Tokyo Joe.” Also, today a Japanese space vehicle landed on the moon for the first time.

Dream Circle, May 29, 2023:

“I participate in a ritual between two cultures: one West, one East. We have been sharing gifts of many varieties for years. Stories, art, spirituality, all. We understand each other, in spite of deep language barriers. In my waking life, of course, I wonder what the Eastern culture is in my present experience. Perhaps a change in patterns. Rereading “No Death, No Fear” by Thich Nhat Hanh is shifting my mindset and my physical sensations. I think about his teachings for most of the day. Turning, turning, turning. A time for every purpose under heaven.“