Servant With Murderous Intent

(Sunday, September 9, 2018) new moon Virgo / tarot Empress

I am being chauffeured by a dark haired man in a vehicle shaped like a very large cube and made of clear glass on all 6 sides. Even in the dream this seems amazing. We are traveling through a savanna full of lions. The driver opens a rear door to allow one lion in to attack me.

Day notes:

There was a video on the news this week about people in a safari vehicle being cuddled by a wild male lion.

When I awoke I thought of the pope-mobile, even though I was a woman in my dream. Pope Joan? Anne included Joan of Arc in her artist story last week. It is beyond irony for a world religion to require a bullet-proof parade van for its high priest.

Lion-hearted. I have been having heart palpitations for a week now. Work-related stress? Attacked in my work cube? The VP of Marketing is a proud Leo.

Manifesto

(Labor Day 2018) moon third quarter Gemini / tarot King of Spirals (Pentacles)

Dream conference: attendees meet at round tables and converse, then move on to other rooms and other topics. Richard W. guides one group in a large, high-ceilinged room. Two men work on manifesting the goal of a one-woman art show for me, through the process of creating reality in the realms. Men who manifest. Fest-ive, fest-oh!

Day notes:

Two friends of mine are having solo art shows this month, Anne and Denisea.

Richard W. shows up so frequently in my dreams that I think he must be the mask of one of my spirit guides. He certainly represents the guidance of dreaming. In my dreams he has more power than it appears he has in waking life.

I admitted to Anne that the dire chaos in my work life seems to be a message for me to leave. But where do I go?

I bought a Cubs t-shirt for Chris in Chicago with the original icon from 1914. It’s a standing bear. It didn’t click in my mind at the time, but the new sculpture I am working on is a standing bear. It will be 60 inches tall.

Journal: Culture Club Chicago

(Labor Day 2018)

I drove down to Highland Park, north of Chicago, for a solo art show by my friend Anne. It was a huge relief to leave town because I found out on Thursday that Alysia, the young designer I work with in Phoenix, is going to be let go. That devastates me.

Anne’s show at the College of Lake County was delightful: well designed, with two great jazz musicians and fine food. I enjoyed meeting her friends, especially a writer named Jane and a ceramicist named Corine. I also met the professors that run the ceramics program at the college. A group of artists are driving up to Minneapolis in March for the national clay conference, so perhaps I will see everyone again.

Anne made images and told slightly fictitious tales of twelve friends. She used fabric and ceramics. In her pieces she calls me Lenore and says I am from Canada. It was good to hear her artist’s talk and see her complete process. It helped me understand her work more fully.

We spent Saturday drinking tea at a local coffee boutique, making a few purchases at Northbrook Commons (where I used to shop with my in-laws), walking in the Fort Sheridan Forest Preserve along Lake Michigan, and attending an outdoor concert at Ravinia. I hesitated to agree to Ravinia, because it was pouring monsoon rain, but Anne assured me it would still be fun. It was a blast. We saw three bands: The Thompson Twins, The B-52s, and Boy George with Culture Club. I adore the B-52s and Chicago did too. Even the little kids were dancing in completely joyful abandon, wearing their soaked rain ponchos.

Any extended time spent with Anne, however, always has a stern, hurtful moment. She was extremely exhausted from putting a large show together in eight weeks, with very little sleep. She actually lost five pounds. In retrospect, I should have stayed at a hotel, even though she has a private guest suite in her Victorian-era mansion where she says I am always welcome.

She states that she is “from the land of Descartes,” which means that, although she was raised Catholic in Provence, France, she is a committed atheist. We were eating dinner at her house and the subject of my trip to Glastonbury came up. I hesitated to tell the detailed story. I knew she would scoff, but in the end I did not see any point to hiding my mystic nature. It is who I am.

I described the shamanic visions I had and the mandala ceremony. She started to barrage me by asking how it affected my life. My guess is she thought my answer would be psychological, but I said it caused my dreams to become more lucid. She flipped out, really, attacking spiritual practices in a pretty vicious way. I patiently, rationally refused to back down. I threw in some science from quantum physics, so perhaps she doesn’t think I am a complete lunatic. Who knows? I had awakened at 2 a.m. that morning during a loud thunderstorm, presciently dreaming about being attacked in my back by a thin, sharp stick. Painful experience.

The culture in Highland Park is very far removed from my heritage and my everyday life. It seems all residents have a PhD from an Ivy League university (mostly law and medical degrees). The homes are enormous, historical, and nestled in the woods along Lake Michigan. There is a bank or investment company on every corner. Still, the college dropout can hold her own. Maybe brilliant Ben Franklin whispers in my ear.

The Dreamsters Union