Journal: Culture Club Chicago

(Labor Day 2018)

I drove down to Highland Park, north of Chicago, for a solo art show by my friend Anne. It was a huge relief to leave town because I found out on Thursday that Alysia, the young designer I work with in Phoenix, is going to be let go. That devastates me.

Anne’s show at the College of Lake County was delightful: well designed, with two great jazz musicians and fine food. I enjoyed meeting her friends, especially a writer named Jane and a ceramicist named Corine. I also met the professors that run the ceramics program at the college. A group of artists are driving up to Minneapolis in March for the national clay conference, so perhaps I will see everyone again.

Anne made images and told slightly fictitious tales of twelve friends. She used fabric and ceramics. In her pieces she calls me Lenore and says I am from Canada. It was good to hear her artist’s talk and see her complete process. It helped me understand her work more fully.

We spent Saturday drinking tea at a local coffee boutique, making a few purchases at Northbrook Commons (where I used to shop with my in-laws), walking in the Fort Sheridan Forest Preserve along Lake Michigan, and attending an outdoor concert at Ravinia. I hesitated to agree to Ravinia, because it was pouring monsoon rain, but Anne assured me it would still be fun. It was a blast. We saw three bands: The Thompson Twins, The B-52s, and Boy George with Culture Club. I adore the B-52s and Chicago did too. Even the little kids were dancing in completely joyful abandon, wearing their soaked rain ponchos.

Any extended time spent with Anne, however, always has a stern, hurtful moment. She was extremely exhausted from putting a large show together in eight weeks, with very little sleep. She actually lost five pounds. In retrospect, I should have stayed at a hotel, even though she has a private guest suite in her Victorian-era mansion where she says I am always welcome.

She states that she is “from the land of Descartes,” which means that, although she was raised Catholic in Provence, France, she is a committed atheist. We were eating dinner at her house and the subject of my trip to Glastonbury came up. I hesitated to tell the detailed story. I knew she would scoff, but in the end I did not see any point to hiding my mystic nature. It is who I am.

I described the shamanic visions I had and the mandala ceremony. She started to barrage me by asking how it affected my life. My guess is she thought my answer would be psychological, but I said it caused my dreams to become more lucid. She flipped out, really, attacking spiritual practices in a pretty vicious way. I patiently, rationally refused to back down. I threw in some science from quantum physics, so perhaps she doesn’t think I am a complete lunatic. Who knows? I had awakened at 2 a.m. that morning during a loud thunderstorm, presciently dreaming about being attacked in my back by a thin, sharp stick. Painful experience.

The culture in Highland Park is very far removed from my heritage and my everyday life. It seems all residents have a PhD from an Ivy League university (mostly law and medical degrees). The homes are enormous, historical, and nestled in the woods along Lake Michigan. There is a bank or investment company on every corner. Still, the college dropout can hold her own. Maybe brilliant Ben Franklin whispers in my ear.

Sleep Paralysis Vision

(Friday, August 31, 2018) waning gibbous moon Taurus / tarot Justice

I head to Chicago today in waking life. Last night a thunderstorm awakens me at 2. There are no dreams in my memory cache. When I fall back to sleep, I enter sleep paralysis. Chris walks past me as I lie in bed. He looks very ill. He tells me he is dead. But when I awake this morning he is still on this side of the veil.

Dream Within A Dream: Victoria Visitation

(Saturday, August 25, 2018) full moon Aquarius / Carmen’s tarot deck nine of wings

Waking dream:

I spy a large feather in the backyard. I walk out to pick it up. It’s a brown turkey feather the size of an eagle feather, surrounded by a ring of smaller feathers. Nine? I bring the big feather into the house and tell Chris the turkeys have left him a birthday present.

Dream within a dream:

I am in a space that repeats the environment of my olfactory dream. The floors, walls and ceilings are carved and polished white stone. Therefore the geometry flows, curving gently. No angle is a perfect ninety degrees. No floor is exactly perpendicular to any wall. The levels of the floors and ceilings vary, like a cave.

The rooms are vast, the number infinite, empty of all decor, including furniture, doors and lighting. Even so, the rooms are brightly lit. Much of this dream has dropped away, but one clear memory remains. I am standing in a room with Victoria and her female associate. Both women are known for their work as dream guides. Victoria’s professional friend is taller, with shoulder-length grey hair. Freya Diamond?

I have summoned Victoria to tell her my dream. I am energetic, excited. Victoria stands near a door to my left, her associate stands to my right, and we all face a wall as I begin to describe my dream. I wave my right arm in a rainbow arch and the dream vision appears, as if the wall is a computer screen. The image on the wall mirrors the “outer” dream: the three of us stand looking at my dream vision. In the dream-within-the-dream, I realize what is happening. I am fully conscious of the universal layers of the dream. I vocally declare my intent, aiming into the deeper vision like I am diving into the sea.

Day notes:

I wonder if this dream is telling me to join the IASD psiber dream conference. I never have. Certainly I should send Victoria a note. When Victoria worked my dream on my birthday at Jeanne’s house, it was my UFO dream called “Synchronous Visions,” which was about two mysterious TV screens.

These dreams-within-dreams are so potent and so hard to describe. The 100% full moon today will be in Pisces, affected by Neptune. Dreams are predicted to be powerful in these hours.

Interesting that two Santa Fe book artists, Victoria and Freya, appear in my dream after my rejection by the Minnesota Center for Book Arts.

The Dreamsters Union