My Transitional Space

(Wednesday, April 16, 2025) waning gibbous moon Sagittarius / tarot Devil

Vivid dreams this morning.

Chris and I have a giant, multi-story house that is being completely renovated, down to the plaster walls. The mansion is nearly empty because of all of the work that is being done. Almost no furniture, no pictures on the walls, no drapes. It is perhaps centuries old because the plaster is very thick and not drywall-smooth.

I am working on the walls, spackling and painting. I enjoy the sculptural texture of the plaster. In some rooms I plan to add wallpaper, so those walls need to be flattened, smoothed. It is curious that many of the rooms have no windows, perhaps because of how huge the house is. Some rooms may only be attached to other interior rooms.

The windows that I do notice are positioned in areas where windows from neighboring houses do not access the inside of my house. They cannot see my interior from the installed angles. As the dreamer I think of my windows as having the function of visual reversal. Mirrors?

I am finishing up my work because Chris is planning for an upcoming, casual party. He is in his thirties or forties, the age when we met. He owns a business and has the same extroverted personality he had back then. As I finish, a bunch of his employees, men and women, enter the house and bounce up several flights of stairs to have a meeting together on the top story.

To get ready for the small party, I head into a bathroom for a shower, to clean up after my project. But the bathroom is completely empty, no shower or sink or toilet. It is under construction. I look out one window and see a beautiful, antique, English-style red brick house.

I search for another bathroom and find one that is part of a bedroom with twin beds, yet still with no completed plumbing facilities. I find a hose on the floor, take off my clothes and give myself a spray.

I am in a hurry because I know our guests are on the way. I am naked and stressed. I have to bolt up the stairs to try to find underwear and clothes. I hear Chris explaining to recent arrivals about a card game we are going to play. Winners get chocolate rewards.

At the end of this dream I become an observer. I am viewing my back, naked but in perfect condition. As women’s bodies often are in our twenties or thirties.

Day notes:

My friend Travis is finishing skim coating and painting my entryway. When he is done my friend Denisea will apply wallpaper. The wallpaper is a pattern that includes flowers, ravens and psychic third-eyes.Weird” wallpaper. Chris likes it. Denisea and I love it. I am painting the heavy second door that will be reattached to the entryway.

This seems to be a dream about a radical change in my life.

Yesterday when I came home from the Mayo I sat across from Chris in the living room and listened to music for a while. I remembered most of the lyrics and sang along. I had a deep spiritual experience (again) about the Mayo. I felt OK with the upcoming transition in my life from coherence to confusion.

I so often dream of backs and spines. I wonder why. I think of my painless Mayo spinal tap, but it is probably a kundalini element. I have been dizzy lately.

My writing from when this was shared with The Dreamsters:
“My Back”
In this dream, I have had anxiety about my body being exposed. There are dozens of people in my renovation project, yet none are around when I am naked. Perhaps my own insight is more clear, more open, more real and without cover, than what others can see. Or being open to all, regardless of my fear, is what can be healing in the end. My back, my spine that travels all the way to the top story (to my brain) is in good health. Kundalini brings eternal youth and energy and connection to the multiverse. Like Bonnie’s magic snakes. I am my own guide. I have my back, as I say in so many dreams. And I am going back to the beginning, as are we all.

Fragment: Dreaming Of Paul On Bonnie’s Birthday

(Monday, April 14, 2025) waning gibbous moon Scorpio / tarot seven of wands

I dream of a long conversation with Paul, Bonnie’s spouse, about dementia, his experience with Alzheimer’s, although in waking life he does not talk about it, at least with me. The dream is vague enough that when I wake up, I am not sure if we are talking in person or if I am entering his mind. A telepathic discussion.

Day notes:

I discovered this morning that my flying lucid dream had a prescient element at the end. I think the young dream girl from many decades ago is the actual woman who was going to build a mansion around 1885. She wanted to call it Rustic Lodge. She owned 20 acres, between 48th and 49th Avenues, and Pleasant and Stevens. Right by my present house and by the house Paul grew up in. Later she thought of having the house built in Hollywood instead, but it never happened.

I have Mayo appointments this Thursday and next Tuesday. On Tuesday I meet a new doctor to discuss genomes and semantic dementia.

Lucid Dream: Flying For My Soulmate

(Thursday, April 3, 2025) waxing crescent moon Gemini / tarot High Priestess

A very lucid dream with strong physical sensations. I am standing at the back of my Rustic Lodge house, in the three-season porch, wishing to find my soul mate. I decide to fly out into the universe. I fly through walls and closed windows and that makes me understand the dream is lucid. I feel the physical reality of the 3D elements I am flying through, but I must be in a different dimension, because nothing impedes me.

I fly towards the sky and the upper atmosphere of our planet. Outer space. I am focused on my search for my soul mate, nothing else. But very soon I feel I am complete, a full being. So I return to my home.

A female neighbor is outside, in the backyard connected to mine. I can tell it is decades in the past, because there are no garages, no fences. She chats with me like we are both adults, but I point out to her that she appears to be a child. She is resting on a swing-set.

Day notes:

The sensation of physical reality passing through my spirit is the most emotional part. In the dream I feel my soulmate within me, and realize I have no need to continue searching.