Category: Bonnie

I am with another woman, but I am not sure who she is. We knock on the door of Kevin’s apartment. Markus answers. He is about 12 years old. He has blond hair. I ask him his name and he tells me. Then he goes into his room. my friend and I go further into the apartment. Kevin is in the kitchen making sandwiches for a picnic across the street at a park. Rowan is there. He is 14 to 15 years old and he also has blond hair. We all say hello. Rowan then shows us the apartment. It looks familiar to me. Across from the kitchen is a free standing wall. Behind it is a large TV. It is shaped like an old TV that is very wide. I say to Kevin he needs a new TV. The TV takes up so much room between the free standing wall and the regular wall that there isn’t much room for people to sit.

Now Rowan and Markus no longer have blond hair. (were they wigs?) Their hair is their normal, medium brown color. Markus has light streaks of color in his hair. I compliment him on it. Rowan then takes us on a tour of his bedroom. It is huge and has its own bathroom. We then go into Kevin and Antonia’s bedroom. It also is huge. It is very neat and has a hammock in one area. We then see Markus in the hallway and I say I would like to see his bedroom also. He seems flattered that I asked. Kevin is on the phone to Antonia. I don’t know if he says the picnic is cancelled or I am anticipating that. End of the Dream.

On 9/7/25 I asked, “What is one thing I can do to help heal Kevin and my relationship?” In waking life, I feel there really isn’t anything I can do except to just wait until Kevin decides he wants us in his life again.

I worked this dream with my AZ group and the Dreamsters. Here is what I wrote: (AZ group). If this were my dream, it’s, in some ways a reality in the future. It is about 9-10 years in the future. 9-10 is completion and a new beginning. Kevin and his family live in an apartment like they do in waking life. It is a more communal living situation as apposed to a single family home. Markus and Rowan have blond hair at first. It is not their real hair. Does this mean they are not comfortable at first to be their authentic selves? Markus keeps some light hair streaks-showing his individuality? Kevin is making sandwiches for a picnic. A picnic is a laid back activity in nature and good for spending quality time together. I tell Kevin he needs a new TV. A TV is for entertainment, news, connection to the world. Maybe I feel he needs a new way to connect with the world and not be so isolated. Rowan shows us his and Kevin/Antonia’s bedrooms. Bedrooms are private places and also can share one’s individual specialness. Both are huge and tall. Kevin and Antonia’s bedroom is very neat-not so laid back as Rowan’s. Did Rowan want me to understand something by showing me his parents bedroom? There is a hammock in the bedroom. Does this show that his parents are more laid back now? I ask Markus to see his bedroom and he is flattered by the positive attention. At the end I am not sure if the picnic is canceled. So maybe this highlights the question if Kevin and I will ever heal our relationship. I took the initiative to visit in the dream. There is not guarantee that it will work.

I worked this dream again with other dreamers. Here is what I wrote: If this were my dream, I am visiting the boys and Kevin in the future and all seems fine until the end when Kevin is talking to Antonia.-Picnic canceled? This estrangement is no picnic! I wonder if I am dreading the difficult talk I need to have with Kevin? Having to hear his complaintss about me. Can I just listen and not take them so personally? And is it ok to speak my truth like I did in the dream when I said Kevin, you need a new TV? Antonia-does she represent the dark side of Kevin. His dark anima? Rowan is similar to Kevin when Kevin was a kid. Maybe it would help me remember that part of Kevin. (kind and sensitive to others) Markus is flattereed I asked to see his bedroom and he has light streaks in his hair. He is more like Antonia in looks. Like Antonia, I have to go out of my way to make a connection? There is a hammock in the bedroom-in Kevin and Antonia’s personal space- Maybe this says that there is a laid back part of Kevin I need to connect with. Kevin and Antonia need a lot or personal space.

I am to take photos of a wedding. I pack my camera gear. I have to push it down into one case. I go to the church. I notice that it is a circular church and has these abstract, circular sculptures on its facade.

I am in the church with a group of people. I see the bride and groom come into the church. Then, we all have to move to another church room. (like there are two interiors in the church). I then look for the rooms where the bride and the groom are getting ready. I cannot find them. I ask different people where they are. I get worried that there is not enough time to take photos before the wedding ceremony. I realize that will not happen. The time has run out. Now I am worried that I will not have enough time to set up my equipment.

The scene changes. I am still at the church. Tom and Ted Middleton are there. I am getting along much better with Tom than with Ted. I am platonically physical with Tom and having a nice conversation. We are all in our fifties.

In waking life, I had a serious crush on Ted. I didn’t really let that go until I was around 43 years old. I didn’t really know Tom that well. They are twins. I met them and worked with them one year at Ruttger’s Resort when I was 20 years old. Ted was a photographer. When I was going to take photos for my first wedding job, he helped me with what photos to take.

I am leaving on a plane that takes off at 6 p.m. I am leaving the place I am staying at to Deb. I am not sure if I own this place or have been renting it. Sheila L. is around. She shows me something she made that is in a box. It is very creative.

I bring a purple bag of my things outside. I tell Deb the second bedroom is not being used. so the woman Deb was to stay with could stay there. (now it feels like is my place)

At one point I go outside and I see this group of 9-10 older women sitting on the wall that runs along my place. They have all this “greenery” on their heads that takes the place of their hair. It is wild and messy. They are all smiling and happy. I go to get my phone to take photos of them. It takes me awhile. I am having trouble getting the camera to work. When I go back the women are gone. They have gone into a bar and restaurant.

(there is a dog that keeps getting out of my place and needs to be put back inside). I am getting grumpy. I am to help Deb’s friend get her bed from the other place. I have my red Toyota. I think I can get it in there. However, it gets too late. I say I have to go or I will miss my plane. I look for my purple bag and find it outside. I tell one of the neighbor women that I have to go and leave for the airport.

Sequel: (I have this sequel later that night). I talk to a man who owns the house where the woman’s bed is about me using my Toyota to pick it up. I reckon we can take the frame apart and get it into the car (I don’t think about the mattress!). Deb has a trailer, but she has left it in Minneapolis. The house with the bed is under construction. It feels like it is located on Willmatt Hill. (neighborhood where I grew up)

I am with Jeanne G. We go into the house. Deb and her friend are in the house, but we do not see them. We head downstairs (basement). Jeanne is ahead of me and goes down to a lower level and then comes up a level. (2 basement levels). We meet on the first level where there is a large, red pump. It is for pumping water out of the house. The house is built on wetlands.

I worked this dream with The Dreamsters. It was a great session. Here is what I wrote: If this were my dream, I am moving to a different plane. Deb and Sheila represent a part of my past. I have and want to move to a deeper soul level. It is difficult to leave my old role of “comforter” (bed). I feel obligated to make sure Deb does not feel abandoned. I think this dream is pointing this out-that my fear of abandonment is holding me back . (old complex). If I abandon my role, I might be abandoned. Or, I might not know who I am without my role. After, the family reunion (July 4th of this year, where the camera didn’t work well like this dream) I got the message that it is time to let go of my role of being the “perfect” member of the family and in my relationships. I look at the women with the vegetation hair as my welcoming committee.

Other insights from the Dreamster members:

Deb and Sheila are like family because I have know them for 45 years (so I am playing my same familiar role). I made the decision to move to another plane. It is time to take flight. The purple bag represents magic and/or my spirituality (crown chakra). And it is time to carry wisdom and my magical self forward. The bag also suggests that I pack lightly. There are 9-10 women on the wall=completion. Having difficulty with my camera represents having a difficult time picturing myself being like the women. The wall the woman are sitting on represents good boundaries and protection. The vegetation on the women’s heads represent strength and new, spring growth. I have difficulty seeing the strength in me. (trouble with camera). The dog is another responsibility I am taking on. I feel resentful. Put that “loyalty” like the dog, from my past away. The dog wants out. He could represent not wanting to be controlled anymore and wanting to play. The old, small house does not fit anymore. My old ways of being a giver and making room for others doesn’t fit anymore. I need masculine energy to build something new. I need to release two layers (levels) of unconscious, past emotions. It is time to use the pump. The red pump also represents my heart chakra. The old house is my old persona. I have friends that will join me on my new plane. I don’t want to be late. (I am 75 and there isn’t much more time on this plane) I need to leave behind old friends, memories, grief and old feelings of responsibilities from the past. I desire to be cherished and honored.